well you can't waste a boner
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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