Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Can I color on your dick again?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize