Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I'm passing your future prison.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
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