I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
