Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize