bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Randomize
