You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize