This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
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He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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