There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize