Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
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