In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
