I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
