How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize