when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
