Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
North Korea, Best Korea!
operation have a gay friend backfired
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
