I cannot find my penis.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I think my moral compass just broke
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