She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
