That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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