she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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