Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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