We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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