I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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