Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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