yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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