What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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