so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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