READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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