i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
