So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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