if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
