I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize