WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
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