I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
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You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
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It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster