Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize