Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.