is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize