STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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