i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
