How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
