what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
