I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
