I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
He? As in you personified your dick?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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