I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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