I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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