You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
