I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize