Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
