One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Randomize
