the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
