I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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