if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
