bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
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and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
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Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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